Beyond the Surface

   As I was backing out of my driveway the other day, I caught a glimpse of something in the mirror that made me come to a screeching halt.
   Lines....and more lines....in the corners of my eyes and around my mouth. Where did those come from and why did I not notice them before? Perhaps it was the glaring sun beaming through the sunroof. I immediately closed it thinking they would magically disappear, with no such luck.
   Today, I am 41 years, 9 months, and 28 days old. Lines and wrinkles on your face are not supposed to appear until you are in your 90's...right? Why is it that I just noticed them a few days ago? The mirror I use every morning when I put my make-up on is much kinder than the rear view mirror in my car.
   I began thinking about the wrinkles and what (if anything) I should do to get rid of them. Getting rid of wrinkles and fine lines makes some doctors a whole lot of money. You cannot look in a magazine without ads for products promising to virtually turn the clock back years. The beauty isle at my local grocery store is full of wrinkle reducers, line eliminators, wrinkly line reducers, puffiness reducers, puffy eye reducers, and every product in between. I would need to get a second job to get all the products to fix the 'flaws' I see in the mirror. A little depressing when you think about it.
   I could forgo the massive over the counter products and see a doctor and get a little Botox here and there. Again....shell out more money to get rid of something that is going to come back, eventually. Or, I could embrace the little flaws with open arms. I thought I had embraced the few gray hairs which were invading the top of my head until I broke down and had my hair colored. After three weeks, the gray hairs made their way back making me realize they have way more resilience than I do when it comes to the beauty ritual of coloring my hair every six weeks for the rest of my life. What's a girl to do?
   I've heard people say, just grow old gracefully. I don't know about you, but I'm having a hard time seeing the new wrinkles on my face and gray hair as being graceful. For me, they are like little alarm clocks all over my face screaming, "Hey...you! Yeah, you....time is marching all over your face!" When you are in your teens, it's cool to look older. At my age, I have no desire to look older!
   After much thought, here's what I've realized. Beyond the surface of the creams, "miracle potions" and hair color, I am still the same person. The wrinkles and gray hairs do not define who I am. It's all about feeling good about yourself. It's about how you carry yourself and how your present yourself to others. If you walk in a room with all the confidence in the world, will anyone really notice a wrinkle? Puffy or saggy eyes? Most likely, they won't. On the other hand, if all the beauty rituals make you feel better about yourself and confident, by all means do it! Embrace what it is that makes you feel good about yourself.
   Grow old gracefully or do all you can to reverse the aging process...whatever you chose, just remember it's beyond the surface that matters the most.

Here we go...

   Yesterday, I registered my daughter for her SENIOR year in high school. I can remember a feeling of excitement and anticipation when we registered my son for his senior year. This time, my feelings were a bit different. Seeing how excited she is about the upcoming year makes me happy, but there is a part of me who wishes I was registering her for her first day of school.
   Driving back to work, I began thinking about her first day of school. This little redheaded, round-faced girl jumped out of the car with excitement and a bit of nervousness. She proudly carried her Barbie backpack and lunchbox as we walked beside her and to her classroom. I could see the uneasy feeling on her face as we walked into the room full of other kids and parents. I kept telling myself over and over again to smile and wait until I got to the car to let the tears flow. That's exactly what I did. I sat in my car for what seemed to be 30 minutes with tears streaming down my face. My little girl was about to embark on her school career and I knew exactly how fast it would go.
   Her morning ritual was for me to fix her hair and breakfast and her Dad took her to school. Years later, I found out they would often stop by the lake that is a few blocks from the school to "throw rocks in the water" because she didn't want to go to school. Big tears would well up in her eyes each morning as they arrived at school. He walked her to her locker until she was in third grade after telling her the other kids might start making fun of her because he was walking her in the school. She finally got brave enough to do it by herself. The first time she did, she stopped at the door to wave at her dad and huge tears filled her eyes. Letting go is even tough on kids. I think it was one of the toughest things my husband had to do.
   I've realized having gone through senior year already doesn't make this time any easier. In fact, it's a bit harder because she is my baby. It will be a year full of lasts and just like her first day of school, I am planning on handling them with a smile on my face and will save the tears for when I am by myself. Tears of pride, tears of happiness and maybe just a few tears of sadness for a childhood which has gone entirely too fast for this mom.
   Senior year....here we go.....

How you live

   I was walking into a meeting when my husband called and told me he heard the news of Robin Williams' death. I only knew Williams from his movies, but like most everyone else, I felt a sense of loss. Almost like a friend had passed. The tributes on social media have been touching. He brought a lot of happiness into the lives of millions of people. While he had earthly troubles that were not always public, his life story was full of achievements...three of his biggest achievements were the children he left behind.
   I began thinking about my life and what would be said about me when it's my time to leave this world. Would I be remembered as someone who was kind, generous, sincere and loyal? Would I leave without any unresolved issues in relationships and/or friendships? Would I leave with people knowing how I felt about them and how they felt about me? Would I leave knowing without a doubt I would enter the kingdom of heaven? Would I have truly "lived" and not just gone through the motions of each and every day?
   In my 41 years, I've made a ton of mistakes, but have done my best to learn from them. I've said things I've regretted and I've hurt people who loved me the most. I've struggled, I've cried and I've experienced times of sorrow. On the other side, I've also experienced success, laughed until I cried and experienced times of immense joy. The good has far outweighed the bad and being a work in progress, I look forward to the days I have left.
   It is my hope when I am gone, I will leave a mark on the lives of those who knew me. It is my hope to have left the world a better place. To not have just mindlessly wondered through the day to day, but to have lived. Lived fully and soaked in every little thing along the way; to have helped people along their way and to have left with those I love knowing how much I truly loved them. To stand before God and have him say, "Ging...you did good, girl. You did good."
   If you've never listened to "How You Live" by Point of Grace, take a few minutes to listen to it below. It is a great example of truly living. 
   "It's not what  you knew and it's not what you did, it's how you lived."

   God bless!

 
  

What are you waiting for?

   While planning our vacation, I began thinking about all the places I want to go "one day." As I sighed when I looked at a picture of New York City in the fall, I said, "I'll go there one day."
   This morning, I woke up thinking of how often I use the phrase "one day." It was scary to think of how often I use the phrase. One day I'll lose 50 pounds; one day I'll run a 5K; one day I'll go visit my dear friend who lives in another state; one day I'll clean out the closet (okay...that one really can wait!) and the list went on and on and on. The phrase hit me hard when I realized I only have so many more "one days" left in my life. It could be one or it could be many. One thing is for sure, I will run out of days one day.
   I have a ton of excuses for putting things on the one day list. I'm busy at work and at home. I'm busy with life. Excuses that allow me to justify not doing the things my heart desires. Perhaps fear plays a part in why somethings are in my one day list. Fear of failure, fear of what others think and fear of the unknown. As long as those things just stay on my list, I feel a sense of accomplishment. What have I really done? Made a list? Anyone can make a list. You can put everything in the world on that list, but until you act...until you decide you truly want it...your one day will pass you by.
   I will no longer keep my one day list hidden in my journal for my eyes only. It's time to stop waiting and take some action! I don't want to come to the end of my days and realize I never attempted to do the things I wanted most in life. I want to write a book. Will I find someone to publish it tomorrow? Probably not, but the chances of publishing one that stays written in my journal in my nightstand are zero percent! My "one days" cannot be controlled by fear or negative thinking.
  Proclaim today to begin checking off the "one days" on your list. Begin by writing them down and putting them somewhere you will see them daily. If making amends with someone is on that list, do it today. Don't wait for the right time, the right day or the right circumstances. One day will come around and you'll be heartbroken you never took that first step.
   What "one days" are on your list? Traveling somewhere you've always wanted to go? Losing weight? Going after a new career? Writing a book? Moving? Going back to school? Write them down and own them! You'll never regret it!

Challenge

   While waiting at a local restaurant with my daughter for our order, I found myself increasingly agitated. The minutes were ticking by and we had still not received our order. The parking lot was
empty and we were the only customers in the building. After a 30 minute wait, I made my way to the front to see what could have been taking so long. Maybe they had gone on strike...on a smoke break...left the country. Surely there was an explanation for why I had to wait so long to get my order. Didn't they realize I'm a busy woman? As I snapped at the employee, I turned and looked at my daughter. The look on her face told me I was getting bent out of shape for nothing. Parents are supposed to be the ones to teach the lessons, not the kids...right? I gave her a smile and apologized for acting so rude. I could not get that moment out of my head for the rest of the week.
     Before I was unintentionally shamed by my 17 year-old, I wanted to get some justice for having to wait so long. I had my phone and was ready to launch into a social media tirade of the restaurant. After all, isn't that the norm nowadays? When we get less than stellar service, we air our grievances to the Facebook world. We often feel vindicated when we do because our friends chime in with their stories of how the waitress got their order wrong, how they had to wait in line or how horrible the food was. Of course, it feels good at first to vent or as a good friend of mine would say, "verbal vomit." An hour or so later when we come back to our post, we feel like the smallest person on the planet. We can delete the post, but one thing is for sure - the damage is already done.
    Bashing restaurants for their lack of service, complaining about a local business, griping about every single teacher and/or coach your kid has and the other rants we get wrapped up in each day are all toxic. They do absolutely no good and do not change a thing. Trust me,  I'm guilty of engaging in this kind of behavior. I think we all have been guilty at some point of launching into a WWIII Facebook defensive attack. When we do so, phones all over town start buzzing with messages that begin, "Did you see what _______ just posted on Facebook?" Is that really how we want to spend our precious time?
    After giving my behavior quite a bit of thought and seeing post after post after post of people ripping others on Facebook this week, I decided to make a change. First of all, in myself.
     I don't know about you, but when someone pats me on the back for a job well done, it completely changes my day. There's no feeling like knowing someone appreciates you and the job you do. The world is full of negativity, but it doesn't have to be. CHANGE BEGINS WITH US!
   Here is my challenge to you. I'm calling it "Project - Pat on the back" and it is my hope it will flood Facebook! The challenge is simple and the results will be phenomenal!

   The rules are simple:

• For one week, you cannot post a comment complaining about a local business or service. If you get bad food or service, you have to contact the manager. NO talking about it on Facebook!
• Every day for a week, you have to give someone a pat on the back! There are plenty of people to choose from - the young man/woman who carries your groceries out to your car; the carhop at the drive-in; the city workers who work in the sun all day making your town look nice; city leaders; preachers; youth ministers; local law enforcement; postal workers; doctors; nurses; coaches/teachers and the list goes on! Be genuine with your feedback. Be sure and give them a shout out on Facebook as well as in person. Write them a note. Anything! Just let them know they are appreciated! When you give them a shout out on Facebook, be sure and put #projectpatontheback in your comment!
• Share this blog post with your Facebook friends. Encourage them to get in on the challenge as well! 
• At the end of the week, decide to keep going! Make a pledge to keep giving others a pat on the back. I'm quite sure you will find yourself receiving praise as well. Am I out of my mind to think this can start a fire on Facebook? I don't think so! Help "Project - Pat on the back" go viral!

   If you have a great experience from joining in my project, I'd love to hear all about it! Message me on Facebook or send me an email to gingwilson72@gmail.com
    I'm ready for the challenge. Are you? 


    
    

It's a Wonderful Life

   My all time favorite movie is, "It's a Wonderful Life" starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed. I know some of you are in shock my favorite movie is NOT a football movie. Don't get me wrong, I have a list of football movies I love, they just don't come anywhere close to having the impact "It's a Wonderful Life" does on me. Beginning on Thanksgiving, I watching this movie about 3-4 times during the holidays. I know every single line by heart, but still tear up several times in the movie. It was produced twenty-six years before I was born, but I have a connection to this movie like no other.
   If you have never seen "It's a Wonderful Life" watch it now! Just make sure you watch the black and white version. It's just not the same in color.
   At some point in our lives, we all have a "pity party" and begin questioning things about our lives. Are we really loved? Do we really have a purpose? Why do things sometimes not go our way? We've all been there and luckily there has always been someone to pull us out of that funk. Life is exactly what we make of it and if we do it just right, we can truly have a wonderful life!

   It's a Wonderful Life has taught me:

And the Oscar goes to....

   Okay, so I have never been nominated for an Oscar. Although, I can be very dramatic if necessary. I'll save that for another post!
   One of the best bloggers I know and a sweet friend nominated my blog for the Liebster Award! Tara Sims and I have a big connection...we are both high school football loving girls! Plus, I am absolutely in love with her precious kids! If you have not had a chance to read her blog, stop what you are doing and read it now! mrscoachsims.blogspot.com  Thank you, Tara for nominating me! It made my heart happy to know my blog is inspiring to others!
   Keep reading for more about the award and my answers to Tara's questions!