What are you doing with your 1440?

   A song came on the radio the other day that I've heard many times. As I sang along, one of the lyrics really stood out to me. It was from the song "Suds in the Bucket" by Sara Evans.  The line that really grabbed my attention was, "And no you can't fence time...."
   Wouldn't it be great to be able to fence time? When life seems like it is going to fast, you could just make it slow down...just a bit. The more I thought about it, the more I realized if we had more time, we would just find something else to fill that time. Pretty crazy thought, but for myself, I know it would be true.
   Having a child who is about to graduate, I really like the concept of fencing time. However, I know the time I've been allotted with my kids at home is just about done and with each passing day, I'm learning to be okay with that. It's part of the plan.
   Time is a gift. We have 1,440 minutes in a day and we get to choose how to spend those minutes. We are in control of every single one of them. Think about your 1440. Are you happy with how you spend it? Do you wish you had more? When the final grain of sand falls in your 1440 and you get a new 1440, do you look back and say...wow...that was a great 1440?
   What are you doing with your 1440? 
  
   

The Dress

   I've managed to keep one article of clothing from when I was a little girl. It's a "Sunday" dress my grandmother made for me when I was a third grader. I think I've held on to it for so long because it's a connection to her.

   Although the fabric is faded from the past 34 years, the stitching is still as strong as it was then. The red ribbon is still secured in a knot she tied and secured with a safety pin.  The dainty lace around the neck and arms has weathered time well. Every single stitch was sewn just for me. I'm sure it didn't take her long to make it, because she was quite the seamstress. It's the fact she took the time to do it just for me that means so much.
   One of my favorite things about this dress (other than the fact my grandmother made it for me) is how proud I was to wear it. My grandmother made me countless dresses throughout the years. I still remember standing in front of her sewing machine as she pinned the pattern, took measurements and allowed me to pick the ribbon. Sometimes, she took me with her and let me pick out the fabric. She always had a way of making me feel special.
   When I wore the dress, I felt pretty. I would spin around in the dress just to watch the skirt flare as I turned. It made an appearance during the school year a time or two. There was just something about this dress that made me want to wear it all the time.

   What have you held on to from your childhood that stirs good memories? 
  

The hardest part is the climb

   For the record, I have never been a fan of roller coasters. Ever! I'll admit, watching from the safety of the flat ground intrigued me and I thought it would be cool to be a roller coaster fanatic.
   Over the years, I've gathered the courage to ride a few. Once I got to the platform and it was my turn to go through the turnstile, my stomach was in knots. When I sat in the seat and they locked me into place with the seat belt, I wanted to hurl. Then, it began.
   The excruciatingly slow climb to the top. The sound of the cars as they clicked the enormous chain propelling the cars upward sent shivers down my spine. I never rode a roller coaster at free will. There was always someone in  my family or a friend who talked me into going. That peer pressure will get you every time!
   Once we got to the top, I would say my prayers and brace for ultimate death. I grasped the bar with all my might, closed my eyes, clenched my teeth and held my breath. The entire ride. The feeling of coming out of the seat when going over a big hill made my heart beat faster. When the ride was over, which usually seemed like hours, I would open my eyes and thank God I made it. The best part was stepping out of the car and back onto the ground. The humiliating part was walking by the stand where they had pictures of all the cars. WHAT? PICTURES? Mine were always quite comical and NO, I never purchased a single one!
   After leaving, there was always a part of me that was glad I took the plunge and rode the roller-coaster. Conquered a fear! Did something out of character for me. I was actually quite envious of those who had a love for roller coasters. Those who could ride them over and over without blinking an eye.
   I think life is a lot like riding a roller coaster. There are things we are often terrified to do. We get anxious, nervous and scared to death. However, once we've done what we were so afraid to do, it wasn't quite as bad as we thought.
   What's the "roller coaster" in your life? 
 

Beautiful you

   One morning while getting ready for work, I realized how much I was picking myself apart while standing in front of the mirror. I started with one physical trait and it snowballed from there. I remembering muttering something like, "Oh, well.." and walked out the door on my way to the office.
   The more I thought about the things I had said to myself that morning, the more I realized I was too busy looking for the flaws to see the characteristics that make me, me. I wondered if I was alone in this "pick on myself" kind of morning, so I posed the following challenge to my Facebook friends.
  "Think about your physical appearance. Tell me what one thing you like the best and one thing you like the least."
   As I began reading the responses, I was not surprised...at what people stated was the thing they liked the best about their physical appearance. When I thought about each person who posted, the trait they liked the best about themselves is what I noticed the most about them! It was definitely their "defining" physical trait in my eyes.
   I then looked at what they liked the least. The one thing they liked the least was something I didn't even notice about them. Several posted their weight or mid-section was what they liked the least. When I closed my eyes and thought about that person, I immediately thought of their best trait.
   The next morning, I had a conversation with my co-workers about my post. I told them the thing I liked the most about my physical appearance was my eyes and the least was the gap between my front two teeth. Their response? What gap?!
   I thought about the responses I had read and what my co-workers told me throughout the day. How could they have not noticed the gap? When I look in the mirror and smile, it looks enormous to me. Why didn't they notice it? For the exact reason I didn't notice the least liked physical traits my friends posted about themselves...we only tend to see physical flaws within our selves and beauty within others.
   We are only as beautiful as we feel and if our own worst enemy is in the mirror, we will never win the "self-confidence" battle. If we look in the mirror and criticize everything we see, how can we walk confidently into the world with our head held high? If you struggle with finding anything you like about yourself, you are not alone! We are looking in the mirror all wrong! We are looking in the mirror, fixing our eyes on the "flaws" instead of fixing our eyes on what makes us beautiful to the rest of the world. Ladies, it's time to begin looking in the mirror with a new attitude!

   Here's my BEAUTIFUL YOU seven day challenge! 
   1. Stand in front of the mirror and smile each morning.
   2. Take a marker and write on the mirror what catches your eye the most. It has to be positive!
   3. Each day, write something new on the mirror.
   4. Each day, send ONE friend a text or email something you think is beautiful about them.
   5. At the end of seven days, combine all the things you've written down about yourself and see
       how the positive has changed your view of the negative!

   Beauty stems from within and if we can look at ourselves with a fresh set of eyes, we will see ourselves the way others see us!

   

Confessions of an insomniac

   I have never been one of the "lucky ones" who fall asleep as soon as their head hits the pillow. My husband's head hits the pillow and it's goodnight, adios, see 'ya in the morning!

   As soon as I close my eyes at night, my mind begins spinning like a washing machine! Some of the most random thoughts flow through my mind, all of which have nothing to do with sleeping! Here's just a small sampling of what runs through my mind when I am trying to sleep: "Did I lock the doors? Is the dryer running? What's that noise? Did I set my alarm? Who is going to win the Super Bowl? What am I going to fix for supper tomorrow?" Trust me, the list goes on and on and on.
   I've implemented a trick that works at times, but usually only when I'm very exhausted. I start with 100 and count backwards. I don't ever start counting at 1 because there's no end and that really messes with my OCD!
   I've tried breathing techniques, listening to white noise and everything else short of taking medication, which I have no plans of doing. I've read some pretty scary stories about people who take prescription sleep medication.
   When I realize I'm not going to go to sleep for a while, I will go into the den and turn on the television. Once I start watching it, I'm up for quite a while. Have you ever watched infomercials at one in the morning? You can buy just about anything in the world and most of the time, if you call "now" they will throw in shipping and an extra set of whatever you are buying.
   Commercials are entertaining in the wee hours of the morning as well. Some of the embarrass me and I'm sitting in the room all by myself! I want to know who invents some of this ridiculous stuff they sell! Someone...somewhere is making a lot of money off of gullible insomniacs across America!
  I see plenty of people post status updates in the middle of the night about not being able to sleep. Hum, perhaps we should all form a support group.
   So, my inquiring mind wants to know, are you a "head hit the pillow sleep all night" person or an "I will never get to sleep watch infomercials" kind of person?

Me and Mrs. C

    Throughout our lives, we meet people who leave lasting impressions on us. Today was the day I met a woman I will never forget.
   Shirl Campbell (better known in our area as Mrs. C) writes a column for our newspaper. Her column is a mixture of humor, patting people on the back and telling it like it is. I read her column each week and laugh, cry and have even shouted amen a time or two! She is real, honest and most of all, sincere.
   Mrs. C greeted me with a huge smile and hug when entered her home. As I sat in her living room, I looked at a wall filled with pictures of her family. There wasn't room on that wall for another photo. Some of the frames had pictures slipped between the frame and outside of the glass as a way of getting more photos on the wall. As she told me who each person was in the photos, she beamed. I grinned pretty big when she pointed out the photos of Kenny Rogers, Dolly Parton and autographed poster of Toby Keith. Another wall held a photo of her parents, one of her and her husband who passed away years ago and President Barack Obama. Again, she beamed with pride as she described the photos.
  We spent time talking about what it was like living in a time of segregation for an article I am working on for our newspaper. We talked about race, the state of our world today, family, her bar-b-que, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., her unwavering faith in God and even a little George Strait. Let's just say she is a big fan!
   I immediately felt a bond to Mrs. C. I felt like I had known her my entire life. Her home was very warm and welcoming. She made me laugh and she made me tear up a time or two. Mrs. C has seen a lot in her 68 years on this earth. Her 25 year-old granddaughter passed away this past Christmas Day after a lengthy battle with cancer. Listening to her talk about this life gone way too soon, my heart felt heavy. In true Mrs. C fashion, she said, "The doctors told us she should have died years ago, but I always told them she would die when God was ready to call her home. Everything happens in His time." Some people would find it easy to be bitter about the situation. A 25 year-old mother of four passing away from a dreadful disease, but Mrs. C praised God for the 25 years she was able to spend with her granddaughter. Her perspective was humbling.
   As I drove the 30 miles home, I thought about what an impact this one woman has. She's crossed so many paths in her life and her footprints are upon the heart of not only her large family, but friends and people in the community. Her sweet spirit reminded me of my grandmother and I wondered if that is what made me feel so connected to her.
   When I began thinking about what I would write in my journal tonight, I decided on a simple entry inspired by Mrs. C consisting of 3 questions I hope to answer in future journal entires.

   1.What impact are you leaving on others?
   2. What are you doing to make the world a better place?
   3. How will others remember you when you are gone?

   My wish is for everyone to meet a person like Mrs. C at least one time in their lives. Friendship knows no color and for that, I'm truly thankful.
  
  

What I've learned in 2014

  The older I get, the more I reflect on the passing of each year. I find myself enjoying the little moments more than I did when my kids were little. Life was so rushed then and I know I failed to stop and enjoy everything like I should have. Now I have a senior in the house and I am soaking up each and every single minute.
   I learned a lot about myself this past year. I've learned how to let go, although I'm still working on letting go of all things. I've checked a few things off the list, so it's progress! I've learned I cannot make people like me. They either do or don't and the reason for not liking me is none of my concern. Heck, I don't like everyone and shouldn't be offended if someone doesn't like me. There are times I don't like myself too much!
   I've learned not to spend too much time stressing over things I cannot change. This one has been very tough. Very, very, very tough. Did I mention tough? I still struggle with it from time to time, but learning this one has really helped me grow into a better person. Closer to the person I want to be. We're all a work in progress, right?
   I've learned friendships take work, no matter how old we get. We all have those friends we just automatically click with and things always seem perfect. We all have those friendships where it's just a bit more difficult, but there's a level of mutual respect that makes it worthwhile. We don't have to enjoy the same things to be friends, we only have to be there. For whatever they need us. I've also learned there are topics you should never discuss if you want the friendship to flourish. It's not about who is right or wrong, it's about respecting differences.
   I've learned hard work actually pays off. Mind you, there were times this year I began to wonder if anyone really noticed what I was doing. One example is my blog. I'd make a post that really resonated deep in my heart and I just knew it was going to make a difference to someone. People would "like" my blog link on Facebook, but I spent time wondering if the words really hit someone like I intended. Right when I felt like giving up my blog, I found a couple of emails from strangers or messages from friends. It's a great feeling knowing your words have touched someone's heart.
   I've learned after 25 years of marriage, it still takes work. I thought somehow 25 would be the magic year when everything suddenly became perfect. After renewing our vows, I just knew we'd never have a disagreement again. Ever. I quickly snapped out of that thought! Marriage takes work and pushing it to the side thinking it doesn't is a big mistake.
   I've learned I'm not as emotionally tough as I once thought. When my daughter started her senior year in the fall, I made it without shedding a single tear. However, over the past two months, I've found myself shedding a tear (or two...or two hundred) when I look at my daughter and realize this girl is about to spread her wings and fly. My tears are more selfish than anything else. I'll miss her, but know it's what is supposed to happen. (When I said I'd learn to let go of things at the beginning of my blog, I wasn't referring to my daughter...my baby girl!)
   I've learned forgiveness is vital to a good life. Bitterness and resentment are poison to the soul. There's a heaviness to your heart when you don't allow yourself to forgive others. Once you forgive, you immediately feel lifted of the burden. Forgiveness doesn't heal broken relationships, but it allows you to close that chapter in your life.
   I've learned being silly is fun, making people laugh makes me happy and being kind has blessed me more than I could ever imagine. I've learned to listen more and talk less. I've learned to stand strong in my faith and I've learned not everyone believes the way I do. While that is very difficult for me to understand, I've learned the best thing to do is love them anyway. I've learned I'm not very lovable at times and am thankful for the people who love me despite those times.
   I've learned I can check things off my bucket list, but it takes effort. I've learned (well, I'm beginning to learn) to love myself a bit more, to stop being so hard on myself and to stop comparing myself with others. I'm who I am for a reason and I'm looking forward to seeing what 2015 has in store for me.
   I wish you all a year full of blessings, happiness and joy beyond imagine.
  God Bless and thanks for reading!